How To Keep The House Clean – Or Not

Less than two weeks ago I had this glorious, life-changing epiphany about house-keeping that was going to lower my stress levels for eternity.

I told you about it. About identifying the one part of the house that has to be clean for you to feel sane, and concentrating on that. Start with that. End the day with that. Guard that.

For me, it’s the kitchen table. It centers me.

I still think it’s a great strategy. Dozens of people have told me – online and off – their “one thing,” and how it’s the same for them.

I still think it’s great advice. I just stink at it.

I turned around to grab something from the table the other day as I bustled past, and laughed at this. So I had to take a picture.

Ready? Left-to-right, that’s: 

• Two rolls of paper towels and a bottle of natural maple syrup that were in a couple bags of groceries from my in-laws. I don’t know how everything got put away except the paper towels and the maple syrup.
• A box of cereal that Husband was probably just snacking on. Pet peeve #17. You’d think if he was going to do it anyway, he’d at least cover his tracks and put the box away. I guess he’s not afraid of me after all.
• An empty glass and coffee mug – The sink is less than ten feet away, but who has the time?
• Olive oil that I had gotten out to rub into Meatball’s scalp before a bath because he has some cradle cap still and it drives me crazy. In my defense, you’re not thinking about getting the bottle back in the cabinet when you’re holding a mostly-naked baby that you’ve just doused in oil.
• A pile of baby clothes I’m in the process of listing on an online consignment store that will be open July 1. (Stay tuned!)
• Plate, butter knife, and plastic food container  – I have no memory of what these were used for, and that scares me.
• Bible
• The green bag was given to us by the hospital as we left six months ago with our new baby. (It has not been on the table for six months.) It’s insulated, for transporting breast milk, so when Husband needed something to pack lunches in for his new job – voila! I’m sure the other guys pouring concrete are super jealous of his cute green bag with the baby footprints on the side.
• The candle, sugar dish, and stack of coasters actually belong in the middle of the table, thankyouverymuch.
• Another plate and butter knife. (I swear we have other utensils.)
• A green Franklin-Covey binder that used to organize my life before the iPhone was invented, and is now a very bulky checkbook. Don’t talk to me about digitizing my checkbook, okay, some things need pen and paper: checkbooks, reading notes, and spoken word pieces.
• Husband’s hat, which becomes his mobile catch-all for keys, wallet, etc., which – I think – kind of defeats much of the purpose of a catch-all, but we’ll just leave it alone.
• Piles of stickers, and a red card, and the big envelope they all came in, from one of Husband’s street-art friends on Instagram

So … you know … find that one thing about your house that just has to be clean for the rest of the house to make sense and … let it go to the dogs. Whatever.

So Crystal Stine hosts this cute link-up on Tuesdays whereby bloggers post the pretty, Pinterest-worthy pictures, but tell the story of the real mess behind the scenes. I creep it sometimes. My picture doesn’t really follow the rules, but I think we’re on the same page, so I’m throwing my hat in this week. Clicky and go check out some other great, honest writers!